One of the best techniques I’ve learned for improving any relationship is the List of Positive Aspects by Abraham-Hicks. It goes something like this: When you are having difficulty with someone, get out a notebook and label it My List of Positive Aspects. At the top of the page, write the name of the person at the top. Now, thinking back over a time or times when you felt something positive about this person, list every positive aspect you can think of about that person. Only write the positive and then sit with it for some moments. Feel that positive energy about this person. When you think again about this person, remember your list. When you do this, people “miraculously” change when they are in your presence, only demonstrating those positive aspects you’ve focused on.
I have used this technique over and over again, with great success. Sometimes it can be a challenge to even start the list, but when you do and practice it, you will end up adding to the list of positive qualities about that person. Eventually, your list about that person will be so long that you no longer need to refer to it as everytime you think about that person, you will hold him or her in that good feeling place.
Even though you’re not feeling it right now, there is always something positive about that person. If you can’t get the feeling right away, focus on something positive about their physical appearance to start. For example, do they have nice hair? Do they have nice eyes? Or perhaps they have a particular skill that you admire, such as excellent editing, beautiful singing voice, or a great dancer. Just write something positive and focus on that.
Today as I’m reminded of interactions that could be challenging, I am grateful that I have a technique like this to shift that from a challenge to no challenge at all. When I am doing so, I know that I am holding them in a place of love and love really does make my world go round!